To Cum or not to cum…

On a website forum I frequent, a guy posted that he didn’t cum. He described having all the sensations of an ejaculation, but no shots of semen, then several minutes later felt a ‘burning’ in his bladder area. He’s experiencing what is called a Retrograde Ejaculation; the semen is going the wrong way. Not particularly harmful that anyone knows of, but it sure doesn’t give a guy the same pleasurable feeling of blasting those shots. I (along with a couple others) told him to go see an urologist.

          But that post reminded me of another situation some guys face: Not being able to cum at all. Painful and frustrating enough to make both heads ache, to make you want to scream and cut your nuts off. (This would be the opposite of Premature Ejaculation.) And I know this from personal experience. And I asked my doctor for a solution. Oddly enough, the solution for both situations is in learning to engage, or disengage, certain muscles.

          When a guy can’t control the time of orgasm it takes a lot of the fun out of any type of sexual activity. The more it happens, the more his interest wanes. Depression can set in, leading into a downward spiral and can become the base reason for psychological erectile dysfunction. If he can’t get it up, he can’t cum too soon. Problem solved, right? Wrong, of course! Because, then, as I’ve posted before, this can cause new long-term health issues.
          The key to controlling when you cum, guys, is in the way you thrust. Yes, an overly sensitive cockhead can help send you over the top – but I’ll save that issue for another post. Ever notice that when a guy stands to plow his dick into – well, whatever he’s plowing it into – it seems he can go on forever? Watch how he’s dipping his stick. It’s because he’s not engaging the root muscles and not squeezing his ass cheeks; he’s moving his entire body, he’s not actually thrusting. Squeezing the ass cheeks is akin to massaging the prostate and, in turn, tightens the root muscles. Tightening those anchor ligaments (Kegels) causes a stimulation to happen along the root of your cock and places an upward pressure along the shaft. Essentially, you are forcing the blood in your dick toward the head, engorging it further, which stretches the skin placing the nerve endings even closer to the surface. Your cockhead gets more sensitive stimulation. The combined action can make your missile fire like a Minute Man Rocket.

          If you have the “I cum too soon” kind of difficulty, pay closer attention to how much and how long you squeeze those ass cheeks. Feel the point of no return popping up in your pecker? Release those muscles. Conversely, if you can’t seem to get your balls to boil over and you’ve been at so long your partner starts yelling “Good fuckin’ God! Would you cum already!” or your arms feel like they’re going to fall off and your dick is raw and sore (yes, a hard-on for an extended period of time hurts) from spanking your stiffy for so long, engage those muscles like never before! Intensify the bump and grind: Thrust those hips forward, squeeze those ass cheeks, and clench the root muscles.

Learning to control these various muscles can also help if you really enjoy prolonged edging. You can flex the cockroot, squeeze the ass cheeks to bring yourself to the edge and then disengage them all to bring yourself back down from the point of no return.

And, as with all things, practice makes perfect! It’s as good an excuse as any for frequent jacking off… “I’m just practicing, honey!”

          Of course, you can always share this knowledge by practicing with a friend or two...